Good for you. Where family rituals were concerned, I completely dropped the ball after Adam died. We had a place at the beach that was our default summer vacay. I went there, but the kids didn't. They had summer jobs and then real jobs and I just forgot about having a family vacation. Just as covid was easing it occurred to me that Adam's absence didn't leave us "not a family," and that we should go somewhere. We went to Maine, and that trip gave me wonderful memories.
But we've not gone anywhere together since then. Doing so may involve bringing along a few new, extra people, and I've wondered how that will upset--or maybe enhance?--our chemistry. I don't know. But your post has inspired me to think about it.
This portion really hit home for me: “When we adjust to our evolving circumstances, we open ourselves to the new. New observations. New emotions. New opportunities. Even when something has been good for us in the past, it may not be good for us in the future.”
We all play the game where we convince ourselves that things will stay the same if we keep our eyes closed and imagine things as they were. Until we simply can’t any longer. It’s always good to have a reminder that this is completely normal human behavior, the act of attempting to wrench control out of the hands of an uncontrollable force. You share so much of yourself here, and I am very thankful that I’ve added your writing to my reading list.
Sometimes the most difficult part of creating space for new experiences, is letting go of those we have grown so attached to over the years. I tell myself there is no reason I can’t bring back those traditions whenever I want. But looking back, I realize what I would have missed, if I had not created that space.
Good for you. Where family rituals were concerned, I completely dropped the ball after Adam died. We had a place at the beach that was our default summer vacay. I went there, but the kids didn't. They had summer jobs and then real jobs and I just forgot about having a family vacation. Just as covid was easing it occurred to me that Adam's absence didn't leave us "not a family," and that we should go somewhere. We went to Maine, and that trip gave me wonderful memories.
But we've not gone anywhere together since then. Doing so may involve bringing along a few new, extra people, and I've wondered how that will upset--or maybe enhance?--our chemistry. I don't know. But your post has inspired me to think about it.
Cheers to new vistas,
Sheryl
This portion really hit home for me: “When we adjust to our evolving circumstances, we open ourselves to the new. New observations. New emotions. New opportunities. Even when something has been good for us in the past, it may not be good for us in the future.”
We all play the game where we convince ourselves that things will stay the same if we keep our eyes closed and imagine things as they were. Until we simply can’t any longer. It’s always good to have a reminder that this is completely normal human behavior, the act of attempting to wrench control out of the hands of an uncontrollable force. You share so much of yourself here, and I am very thankful that I’ve added your writing to my reading list.
Sometimes the most difficult part of creating space for new experiences, is letting go of those we have grown so attached to over the years. I tell myself there is no reason I can’t bring back those traditions whenever I want. But looking back, I realize what I would have missed, if I had not created that space.