#139: Revisiting the pilgrim path.
The trail I can’t seem to leave behind.
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All June long, my iPhone kept ambushing me with memories.
ON THIS DAY: Ancient pine trees reaching for the sun. Gravel roads unspooling ahead. Rivers burbling by. Surprisingly sneaky cows making their move.
Along with the photos came their locations, places with names I still can barely pronounce: Erikslund, Ostersund, Vuku.
Each iPhone memory felt like staring through a window at a completely different version of myself. The Sue who woke up each morning with exactly two responsibilities: make a cheese sandwich for the road and take care of her feet. The Sue who met strangers and saw new landscapes every single day. The Sue who slept in tiny twin beds and felt more peaceful than she had in years.
One year ago, I thought I was going on that solo journey to excavate my grief. What I found was... well, honestly? I'm still figuring it out. Some kind of peace and power I can't quite name…
I know many of you read The Luminist not just for wisdom about loss, but to see where my adventures take me next. And taking you along with me is half the fun. So on this 4th of July weekend — when we're hopefully chilling with a beer and a burger — let's skip the serious stuff and head back to the pilgrim path.
Here’s a re-run of my missives from the middle of nowhere, plus some post-journey pondering.
Pilgrim Letter #1: The comfort zone has been left behind. Stockholm, Sweden. Day: 0. Kilometer: 0.
Pilgrim Letter #2: An ode to slow. Lombacken, Sweden. Day: 7. Kilometer: 100.
Pilgrim Letter #3: Momentum, mistakes, and making it up as you go along. Alsen, Sweden. Day: 14. Kilometer: 265.
Pilgrim Letter #4: Retiring robot mode. Sul, Norway. Day: 21. Kilometer: 390.
Pilgrim Letter #5: I did it! And I need a moment. Trondheim, Norway. Day: 28. Kilometer: 560.
Post #94: The secret ingredient of self-confidence: self-knowledge. How 28 days walking with me, myself, and I made me feel invincible.
I'm deep in revisions for Do Loss right now. But once we've released that beauty into the world, I am going to circle back and figure out what really happened on that trail. I'm planning an entirely separate book called Midlife Pilgrim, because something profound happened during those 28 days that I can't quite name yet. The kind of something that changes you from the inside out but takes a while to understand.
So come walk with me again. Let’s see what we notice the second time around.
To the simple life,
